Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder