***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
