Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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