Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
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Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
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I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize