I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
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