Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
