just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
