I'd wear matching sweaters with you
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Randomize