If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
But break dance skills will only take you so far
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
