great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
