your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
My pussy is not your playground.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
I'm both gender and math confused
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
