Midget sex pt 2 tonight
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Randomize
