Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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