why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize