I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
