i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
