mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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