i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
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