Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Randomize
