so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Randomize
