dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
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