Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
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"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
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Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.