walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
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