Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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