So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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