She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize