You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize
