what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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