of course. lets lasso hookers.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
how drunk are you?
Several
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Randomize
