Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
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