im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
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