I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
