I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
