Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
