It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
