so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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