I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Randomize
