I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
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