The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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