that's an acceptable place to lick
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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