whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
