I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize