She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
