Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Randomize
