my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
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