do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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