I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
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At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
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No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
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