Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back. http://tfl.nu/2rvp
  Replies (24) Good night (7302) Bad night (858)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (503): she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!! http://tfl.nu/wu20
  Replies (35) Good night (5135) Bad night (723)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (714): I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest. http://tfl.nu/jip9
  Replies (28) Good night (1684) Bad night (6118)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (860): it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once http://tfl.nu/6yr8
  Replies (9) Good night (4232) Bad night (927)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (585): I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet. http://tfl.nu/fy09
  Replies (16) Good night (6569) Bad night (1368)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick http://tfl.nu/s4cq
  Replies (18) Good night (9541) Bad night (1663)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids. http://tfl.nu/99eg
  Replies (6) Good night (1355) Bad night (2951)
• Favorite

  (240): View more from Maryland

  Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  She's got a legit dose of dude going on

  (240): View more from Maryland

  No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (240): Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden (202): She's got a legit dose of dude going on (240): No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne. http://tfl.nu/qro2
  Replies (7) Good night (1057) Bad night (1943)
• Favorite

  (506): View more from New Brunswick

  Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (506): Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes. http://tfl.nu/7d2r
  Replies (2) Good night (1941) Bad night (695)
• Favorite

  (530): View more from California

  It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (530): It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle. http://tfl.nu/j4o3
  Replies (9) Good night (2126) Bad night (610)
• Favorite

  (605): View more from South Dakota

  But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (605): But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday.... http://tfl.nu/rigs
  Replies (2) Good night (982) Bad night (531)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (503): Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism? http://tfl.nu/3od1
  Replies (3) Good night (999) Bad night (403)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (304): My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me http://tfl.nu/flmi
  Replies (4) Good night (700) Bad night (280)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (413): So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober? http://tfl.nu/dhkh
  Replies (1) Good night (374) Bad night (528)
• Favorite

  (587): View more from Alberta

  We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (587): We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator. http://tfl.nu/8kzg
  Replies (2) Good night (508) Bad night (259)

Randomize