Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(317): View more from Indiana

Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.

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(317): Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother. http://tfl.nu/z8j5

Replies (28) Good night (1732) Bad night (654)
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.

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(508): If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you. http://tfl.nu/1yt8

Replies (9) Good night (727) Bad night (1824)
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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.

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(832): If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs. http://tfl.nu/152p

Replies (9) Good night (2393) Bad night (488)
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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.

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(610): it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me. http://tfl.nu/3ypx

Replies (27) Good night (1156) Bad night (11288)
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(801): View more from Utah

She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.

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(801): She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex. http://tfl.nu/3ix3

Replies (19) Good night (2371) Bad night (6110)
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(732): View more from New Jersey

This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.

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(732): This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together. http://tfl.nu/028o

Replies (4) Good night (1149) Bad night (3839)
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS

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(508): so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS http://tfl.nu/purw

Replies (11) Good night (1410) Bad night (3310)
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(914): View more from New York

Drunk. I slept-stripped.

(914): View more from New York

By myself.

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(914): Drunk. I slept-stripped. (914): By myself. http://tfl.nu/r1zm

Replies (4) Good night (2323) Bad night (916)
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(817): View more from Texas

I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.

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(817): I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number. http://tfl.nu/dwaz

Replies (1) Good night (2749) Bad night (670)
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.

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(508): I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper. http://tfl.nu/3wm1

Replies (13) Good night (2122) Bad night (1118)
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(614): View more from Ohio

Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.

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(614): Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning. http://tfl.nu/meuz

Replies (11) Good night (2160) Bad night (1032)
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(513): View more from Ohio

2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.

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(513): 2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless. http://tfl.nu/7smn

Replies (16) Good night (4118) Bad night (687)
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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.

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(902): Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control. http://tfl.nu/b8uq

Replies (7) Good night (1222) Bad night (510)
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(312): View more from Illinois

I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.

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(312): I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will. http://tfl.nu/1dfb

Replies (0) Good night (603) Bad night (334)
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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.

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(902): I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks. http://tfl.nu/hv7j

Replies (5) Good night (820) Bad night (286)

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