just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
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