When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Randomize