Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
