in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
